Well, I am a case.
After achieving temporary enlightenment at ZoukFest [see above post], I came home where I promptly made life difficult for my wife, had a dream in which my balls fell off, and spent most of today in a vise of horror. Later I got better, and after a refreshing, lovely time eating out with my sweetie, we took a little drive and I messed up her car.
We were visiting a house for rent. While backing out of a neighbor’s driveway, I grazed an old parked Subaru and bashed the right-hand side of the bumper. Ours, not the Subie’s! I think the damage is just cosmetic and can be painted over, but geez, this is not the way to end an evening — I’d say don’t try this at home, but that’s the only place it counts, haha. She didn’t want me to back up! She wanted me to drive ahead and turn around in the parking lot, but naturally I knew better. I wasn’t even depressed any more. I was happy. Who knew it wasn’t safe to operate heavy machinery AFTER?
The bumper and the Subie are just props in a play. What I really hit was her. Relationship. Trust. She’s already forgiven me, but I know why all this happened.
(Do you?)
Comment by Number 6
1 June 17, 2008, 10:59 am o'clock |
don’t repair it. leave the bumper as is. i call it a “karmic dent”; i have one a decade old on the side of my ‘85 jetta, and it’s kept me out of accidents/fender benders ever since.
(plus, for your specific situation, it’ll be a helpful constant reminder of the deeper issues you describe in the post. who knows, there’ll be some future situation where you’re about to fall in that pit/trap yet again, you’ll see the bumper, and go “oh yeah! DUH!” and maybe avoid the extra turmoil.)
man, this whole “personal growth and evolution” thing can be a real bitch, huh?……
(ps- you never answered my email about what photoshop filter you used for the header image ^_^ )
Comment by Gregory LeFever
2 June 17, 2008, 5:46 pm o'clock |
Thanks, Number 6. I thought I was the only one peculiar enough to believe in karmic dents. A few years back with a new Subaru, my wife scraped up the bumper and I thought, “Whew. That’s done, and not all that bad.” I left it there. And there’s never been another dent since. It’s been that way on car after car I’ve owned.
Pay heed to Number 6, John. It’s certainly worth considering.
Comment by Number 6
3 June 17, 2008, 8:28 pm o'clock |
ah! right back at ya, greg! i also thought i was the only one who “got it” about the phenomenon. it was simple observation actually: i’d get a dent repaired, and within a few weeks there was another, so that last one i just decided “leave it”, and based on my experiential observations it just seemed to work.
also, just had a flash about how that works as allegory/metaphor as well: the “karmic dents” in one’s soul, the painful experiences that shape who you are, and maybe prevent you from making the same mistakes over and over again.
even though star trek 5 (the one written & directed by shatner) is a steaming turd of a film (trek or otherwise), there *is* a certain truth to kirk’s lines (when sybok wants to “take away his pain”) about how it’s that pain that helps define us, is a part of us, makes us human, etc etc.
Comment by Carmel
4 June 18, 2008, 9:13 pm o'clock |
Oh you boys! EVERYONE knows about karmic dents don’t they?
Comment by John H. Farr
5 June 18, 2008, 11:49 pm o'clock |
This isn’t a dent so much as a defacing. Fiberglass doesn’t dent so well, anyway. And I will have it painted, just as soon as I visit the Geico website and lower our deductible. (If you people are right, I’m gonna need that.)
Comment by Number 6
6 June 19, 2008, 10:52 am o'clock |
dent, defacing, scratch, whatever. the type of blemish isn’t important, just the fact that it exists. a bit of imperfection that keeps the Universe from going “Oh, he’s trying to keep everything too perfect and pristine and precise. Gonna have to throw ANOTHER curveball to remind him What’s Up.” (and that NEXT one may not be so cosmetically inconsequential)
i remember hearing something decades ago about how the weavers of “oriental” rugs (middle eastern, turkish, etc) always purposely wove an error into their intricate designs, the idea being that only god is perfect. imperceptible to anyone looking at it, but THEY knew it was there, and it kept the “karmic hounds” at bay.
(hmmm, there’s a name for a band: The Karmic Hounds…. or The Karmic Dents for that matter… ^_^ )
i STILL say leave it as is.
(and i must apologize for misspelling “experiential” in my earlier post - typing too fast in my enthusiasm…)
Comment by John H. Farr
7 June 19, 2008, 11:09 am o'clock |
What’s being overlooked here is that there are already plenty of BIG scratches, blemishes, and some godawful chips in the front.
I will have the bumper painted. My outlook on the world will improve. I LOVE cars, you know.
Comment by Number 6
8 June 19, 2008, 11:57 am o'clock |
ok, that makes sense. and to totally contradict what i said above, there’s also the premise that by repairing the karmic dents to one’s soul, you’re getting past pain/psychic wounds that may be preventing you from evolving. yes, the pain makes you who you are, but there’s who you are and who you could be. it’s always good to remember where you came from (so as not to repeat the same mistakes), but there’s the flip side of that: wallowing in and fetishizing your pain, which is detrimental to growth.
don’t you just love the contradictory nature of being Human? sure keeps thing from getting too boring…